Success does not equal fulfilment

I have been very interested in the topics of personal development, creativity and strengthening awareness and mindfulness for a long time. Nowadays, there are so many opportunities to find out more about these topics, to receive further training and coaching. We have never been so close to all sources of information. And I think it's great because we can finally start to believe in ourselves and our potential again.

We in German-speaking countries are so privileged. Most of us have the best conditions to lead a wonderful life. Our basic needs are covered from an early age. This is an aspect that gives us a great advantage, because it allows us to fully focus on really and truly developing ourselves. But perhaps it is precisely because we have everything that we become too comfortable and start to nest in the bubble we live in and therefore stop developing further.

"The career is going quite well." "The money is good." "The children are growing." "I go on holiday 1-2 times a year." "Life is OK."

If this is the right path, then that's the way it is. There's nothing you can do about it. The potential is exhausted.

But is that really true?

As children, we are explorers, we think up the most impossible things, we believe in elves, fairies and unicorns. We discover ourselves and test our limits. We push these boundaries further and further. We laugh. We cry. We argue and make up again straight away. We don't hold grudges and we forgive.

Why do we stop doing this as we get older? Why do we set ourselves limits at some point and start to judge other people? It seems to me to be an insidious process that is supposed to prepare us for "real" life.

But this construct actually only limits our incredible abilities and we forget to dream big. To utilise our imagination and our potential.

We turn ourselves into someone we are not. We disguise ourselves. But for what & for whom? Does it make us fulfilled & happy or rather functional. It just works ... somehow.

It is only in "old age" (some earlier, others later), when everyday life holds us in its grip, that we realise more and more often that this life we have been given has so much more to offer. We realise that something is missing. Something is allowed to change. We dare and start to talk officially about the various offers and techniques for realising our potential. Even if we don't always call it that. I am grateful that this moment is coming for many of us. Especially in these special times.

But ... it is so important to me to give our children's generation everything they need to lead a fulfilled life. By that I don't mean the traditional school education, being in competition, being praised when you do something "right". That may make you successful in life. But by no means fulfilled. Fulfilment comes from healthy self-worth, empathy, balance, boundlessness and, above all, love.

Because if our children grow up in the confidence that they are not great because they have achieved something, but because they are already perfect beings by nature, then they will never grow up in lack, but always in abundance.

For us, adults, it is now a matter of questioning and breaking through a long series of negative beliefs and educational methods. In other words, to start with ourselves. Our children notice through their fine antennae when we change, when the atmosphere at home changes and when we live more mindfully.

And although children realise this subconsciously, we can also help them to avoid falling into self-doubt in the first place. So that beliefs such as "I'm not good enough" don't creep in in the first place.

So often things have to happen quickly in everyday family life, we become careless, we are irritable and say things that we later regret. We parents are "only" human too. We also have our baggage to carry. That's ok. But it's precisely then that we should take the time on the same day to review these moments. To recognise and understand the feelings that have arisen, but also to let them go.

I have thought so much about how we live our everyday lives with children that I have started to take notes, ask myself questions and also ask the children certain questions in the evening.

Questions like: "What are you grateful for today? What are you strong in? What do you want to learn?". These questions sometimes got lost in the hustle and bustle of the evening routines and I wasn't always spontaneous and creative enough to pull the right questions out of my hat.

That's why I started to create a mindfulness journal for kids from my notes. A journal that encourages children to stay in their power, to believe in themselves, to recognise their own strengths and to develop freely.

It contains wonderful affirmations, stress-reducing exercises and questions about daily experiences for self-reflection.

It is my innermost wish that my children will no longer have to work through countless blockages and negative beliefs that we have given them as adults.

Anything is possible.

Alicja.